I was born back east, in the nether regions, in the years just after the war but just before the fighting. I was a   complete surprise to my father and mother and everyone else in the dance contest being I was born an only twin. My father took one look at me and named me “Jimbo”, which was a disappointment for Mom. She wanted to name me “James”. She got even when she bought me my first doll. My first few years my parent’s keep me in a dresser drawer because they could not afford a crib and a few times the drawer got closed with me in it. They say it was an accident but I think my brothers had something to do with it. They used a wheel-barrel for a baby stroller and the same wheel-barrel to clean out the cow manure. My brothers taught me a lot of things like being pushed down the stairs, being hit with a baseball bat, being pushed out of a tall tree, and taught me how to ride a bike by sending me down a steep road with out telling me the bike had no brakes.

  Blessed with instinctive common sense, I stopped growing at the height of 5′ foot 12″ since the door to the log cabin was 5′ foot 9″. I attended Cedar Grove School where I haded to walk 19 miles to school in the snow up hill both ways. I didn’t learn much being that the school was 20 miles away. That lasted until I was 20 and then I went to Junior High, which I enjoyed very much until they assigned homework. That’s when I immediately left school to join my father’s business collecting unemployment insurance, but there were problems because I didn’t have enough job skills for the government to decide what type of work I was out of.

  Eventually, I left home to strike out on my own, which is pretty much what I did. I tried my hand at carpentry and welding and then, while that was healing I tried my other hand at plumbing and electrical work. I recovered almost completely in the hospital mental recovery room an met some people in the same condition as I still am. I then became interested in working on repairing printing equipment even through I didn’t know what I was doing. It keeps me pretty much busy repairing things despite the fact that I had to keep repairing things that I damage. My work was very stressful. It was very hard to get any sleep when they expect me to do something for my pay. They say that they pay you for what you know, boy am I over paid. Some of the people their are not too smart because they think I am smart and I dun got more better English. Around this time I met a lot of new friends, some charge me a lot of money to be my friends. Some of them made me feel just like back home in the mental ward.

At a church picnic is where I met Sharon; we both had gone for free food. Sharon and I fell instantly in love. We had a lot in common, she likes me and I like me. After dating for twelve years we decided it was time to take the relationship to the next step and go out in public together so everyone can see what an unusual couple we are.

  22 years ago we bought a house together, so I borrowed a large sum of money from her brother who said that no one will miss it at the bank just before he was fired from the bank. I am paying her brother back by sending him a check every month. With any luck he will be out in about ten to fifteen years.

Some say I am a walking disaster area, a complete physical klutz. The good news is that I’m also indestructible… no, wait that’s bad news cause it means I keep coming back and hurting myself. The good news is that I’m a complete optimist and laughs in the face of danger… no, come to think of it, that’s bad news too, cause it means I always do things the hard way. I do not really understand the laws of physics, and so sometimes I brake them accidentally.